Staple or Sew

What you are about to read may seem shocking, you may empathize or think I'm stark raving mad, but this is all in good fun.

I exited Union Station on my way to my interview today, and while i felt the lining of my favorite purple pencil skirt riding up I scuffled along looking for a corner to hide so that I could pull the aforementioned lining down. Just my luck there was no such corner in sight, instead the only thing I found was the sound of the slit rip and all I could feel was a more than uncomfortable backside breeze. I scanned the area for a bench and dialed my version of 911 to my favorite Aunt's cellphone. As I sat down waiting for my guardian angel (who thankfully works strides away from the scene of the crime) I had to laugh to keep from crying. There's a reason I forced myself to leave 2 hours ahead of time, not because I'm psychic and could see my skirt ripping while walking down 1st street before it happened, if I had I would have worn pants.

I had the oddest eureka moment, let me explain: There's always that person on Project Runway you think is just too crazy, even for the show. Well today I finally understood Jason & the stapler. For those of you that don't watch Project Runway this is a guy who took a kimono, put it on his model backwards, stapled it together and called it fashion-forward. In an act of terminal desperation I asked my aunt to bring me a stapler & a sewing kit, thank God my guardian angel's mother was a seamstress. Suffice it to say I never used the stapler and she stitched my skirt back to perfection in 5 minutes, with a few tacks on the lining so I wouldn't have to face disaster two times in one day.

(image courtesy of Rahxy on deviantart.com)

That's all she wrote... For Now