The Age of Power

Ever feel like things are slipping away but you can't seem to understand why? Welcome to my world. You know the basics; I just finished undergrad, I turned twenty 7 months ago and now I'm stuck in limbo trying to move to NYC but not exactly sure when that's going to happen.

I've been dwelling on my quarter life crisis, and it's not as if I really have anything to be in a 'crisis' about. My world is changing and it happens to people every day. I finally got my copy of Communion by bell hooks today and twenty pages in I've realized something: this feeling of powerlessness that I've been dealing with is socialized (SUPRISE: like everything else tied to my 'femininity,' it's not inherent). hooks explains in the first chapter of the book that with age for a lot of women comes a sense of losing power, until they reach mid-life, that's when they start to get it back. I'm not sure why this resonates so well with me, it's not as if I had any intention of giving up my freedom, my freedom just somehow got attached to my adolescence. I'm only twenty years old, but I feel as if somewhere between my dream of wanting to be Editor-in-Chief and the part where I enter the real world and am actually supposed to make my dream happen, I was complicit in the giving up of my power; my brazen, hold no punches attitude. I think to myself, "I've got to get it back" (sounds eerily like one of those middle age women pining for their youth), but the truth is when I read this blog I realize it's still there, I just feel like it's not. So in the words of the late, great princess of R&B, Aaliyah - "age ain't nothing but a number."

That's all she wrote... For Now